THINGS THAT MAKE ME SMILE:)

Last night, after the kids were in bed, this wonderful man and I watched a senseless movie snuggled up on the couch together. Really, the movie was a waste of time, the being together wasn't:) I am so thankful that we have survived the last year +, are closer than ever, and that he still walks along side of me every day.
These 4 pumpkins, of course there is one sweet little girl pumpkin missing, make me smile a HUGE smile. As much as there can be moments of frustration while parenting, these guys, plus little HOPE, are the joy of my life... My kids can be so amazingly helpful, hopeful, and sensitive... I am so thankful for who God is molding each of them into.

Now this will seem extremely trivial... but hot tea brings a total smile to my face. I love pretty much any kind of tea. I am not a trendy "tea snob":) But truly, a warm glass of tea in a pretty mug makes me feel warm, cozy and good inside.

Another trivial thing, but I love eating off pretty dishes or utensils. My in-laws just gave us Greg's grandmother's silver. Sorry Mom and Dad Hintz, (I know you really won't care:) but we are using it as our daily silverware... I love it. It is beautiful. I am done saving things for "just the perfect" occasion. That "perfect occasion" may never come, and I want my family to know that they alone are a perfect occasion:)

Ahhhh, a warm bath in my tub.... the absolute most relaxing thing for me... besides a massage:) I know I don't have the most beautiful feet, but taking a bath makes me smile... the hotter the water the better. I have read on one of my friends blogs that she tries to take a bath every night... is that still true Tracy? I think that is awesome.... I may have to steal that wonderful idea and make it part of my routine:)

So yesterday we had kind of a BIG meeting regarding HOPE'S future. In a couple of weeks we will do our thing in court... That will happen on a couple of different days.

Ultimately we REALLY and TRULY want what is best for HOPE... Selfishly given the situation, we can't help but think that is with us. I have many feelings swirling around inside of me. There are moments of sheer frustration and sorrow when I think of handing her over and possibly never seeing her again... (We have been through that before... oh my!) Then I think I have moments of denial, where I just don't even let my mind go there. And moments of perfect peace, where I have a calm, knowing it is in the Lord's hands to move the mountains that need moving. That is the best place for it to be, I truly believe that. I also balance that with the reality that God doesn't always move the mountains we are hoping he will move... have experienced that a lot in the last 15 months. Really, I just can't wait for something to go as we would hope or like. I am getting tired and weary... I so badly want to be on the other side of this... so badly want to see my hearts desires come to fruition... so badly want God's will to be done.

So I think I will get myself a nice big glass of tea, stir in some honey with my pretty silver spoon, finish homeschooling with the kids, head to coupon shop and church and end my day with another glass of tea, my bible and candles lit while I soak in the tub.... ahhhh... that will relieve some of the stress! Blessings friends.