Saturday, December 25, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Have to take a quick break from all the cooking to do a little dancing:)
Hope is getting all tuckered out and ready for a nap.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
I posted these pictures because honestly, I couldn't resist. He just makes me smile, laugh and be filled with joy. Today he told me he loved my little tiny buns....Excuse me???? I just had to crack up, because I think the extra calories I am intaking are heading right there these days:)
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
LOUIS TOOK AND EDITED BOTH OF THESE PICTURES... I THINK I LOVE THEM BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE THE KIDS ARE TRYING TO SKI... I HAVE GREAT MEMORIES OF SKIING UP NORTH WHEN I WAS A KID:)
Saturday, December 11, 2010
A YEAR AGO TODAY WE GOT A PHONE CALL AROUND 10 AM ....
ASKING IF WE COULD PICK UP THIS PRECIOUS PUMPKIN LATER IN THE DAY...
(this was her first car ride home with us... I think she was worn out from having had quite a day)
WAS THIS THE ANSWER TO OUR PRAYERS???
OUR HEARTS WERE OVERJOYED... AND A BIT ANXIOUS TOO:)
SHE IS A TRUE GIFT AND BLESSING FROM OUR GOD!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
This is a picture of the gift that my parents had made for us to put in Samuel's garden. I love the little boy figurine with the bird resting in his hand. It continues to remind me that if the Lord will watch over even the Sparrow, how much more so will he care and watch over our family.
I love the plaque that they had made. This may all sound a bit strange to you, but here goes... I still feel 100% at peace with having had Samuel cremated... it was totally the right choice for us... given especially that we didn't know if we would even be living here 8 mos. after he died. I just couldn't bury him and leave him here.
I love that we have a garden planted for him right in our yard, with a bench where we can sit, cry, think and talk to God. I often lay on the bench, staring up at the sky and ponder... What is my son doing right now in Heaven... what does he look like, Who does he know up there? Whenever I look at the big vast sky my thoughts go right to him. Right now the garden looks pretty sad... all dead and empty... but I know come Spring it will be beautiful again... Ahhhh new life!
For some reason the plaque makes our little area for Samuel more official in my eyes. I can see his name right there in front of me, in print, permanant... I LOVE THAT.... PERMANANT... He is a permanant part of our family... even though he is rarely mentioned by others... The plaque reminding me that nothing will ever separate me from God's love...for the love He had for Samuel and has for each one of us... This gift meant so much to me, especially coming from my parents.
I came across this post on facebook today... not that I am really a fan of facebook ... but I found this quote and it struck me as so very true...
If you know someone who has lost a child, and you are afraid to mention it to them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died-- You are not reminding them. They didn't forget they died. What you are reminding them of is that you remembered that they lived, and that is a great gift... Elizabeth Edwards....
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Anna and Sara Beth
I was a complete slacker over the Thanksgiving holidays as far as taking pictures goes. We did grab a few of the kids with my sister Beth's kids from Boston. Since my parents live right next door to my 2 brothers there were up to 16 kids running around but only my sister's family and her 4 kids, and our family actually stayed with my parents. It made for a ton of fun for the kids...and a lot of busyness that is for sure.
Thanks to my sister's planning we were able to actually get all 5 of us siblings and spouses together for dinner out. Louis and a couple of the older girls watched the little ones for us. I can't tell you how nice it is to have a child old enough to babysit. At the same time, it makes me a little sad that I have one that old... I know that sounds crazy. We had a lot of good laughs over dinner... it was just nice to be together. My sister and I rarely get home at the same time, so when we do, it is a treat. She is a great listener:)
My parents had a really nice gift made for Samuel's garden. I will need to go out there and get a picture and then post about it. It meant so much to me for them to do that for us in memory of Samuel.
I had an absolutely delightful night out for tea with my college roommate Samantha. She has been one to TOTALLY hang with me over the last 2 years... she is always reminding me that her boots are still on for the stormy weather we may face at any time. She never tires of hearing what I have to say. We had a lot of time to talk about what is new with her, and she is so intuitive... she asked lots of questions about how I am doing with being pregnant again after Samuel. She knows how absolutely overjoyed I am, but yet understands the fears that can also be involved after losing a child full term. It was so nice for me to be able to talk freely, and be real about ALL the feelings I am experiencing as a part of this pregnancy. I love you my sweet friend Sam:)
As far as feelings... I think we have got a name... pretty sure that is. I am not sure the kids all love it... but that is why they will get to name their kids. Greg and I love the meaning behind why we may name this baby boy these names.... I am not sure we will actually share it before the birth or not. It is funny, this is the first time we have actually known the sex, so it is a bit different. This little pumpkin is moving more and I just love it. It sets my heart at ease, and truly, I feel like when I feel him move... my heart falls more and more in love with him. I am 22 weeks today and that would make it about 16 weeks until we can meet him unless we have a reason to meet him earlier. I know 16 weeks seems like a ton, but my heart rejoices that we are getting closer. This may sound crazy but I always breath a sigh of relief at 24 weeks, viability, when this little guy would have a chance of surviving if born. I am also thrilled that we are so close to the holidays... It always makes these couple of months go by so quickly.
I want to cherish the moments and memories with my family... but I would be lying if I didn't say... that I just plain can't wait to get to Spring when hopefully we will meet this precious little gift God has blessed us with.
I have a prayer request for you... I don't know why I didn't post it right away... I was totally a lazy blogger while up north...
While we were up in Wisconsin, my sister in law Katy's niece Brienna was in a really serious car accident. She was actually outside of her vehicle at the time and was hit by a drunk driver who was going 50 mph. She was hit and thrown 50 feet. The driver fled the scene, but thankfully was caught by police later that night. It is a TOTAL miracle that Brienna survived and she is doing miraculously well. She did have lots of facial lacerations, some broken bones and some bleeding on her brain. She will require a lot of therapy and some more surgeries. She is only 18 years old. The Lord is clearly using this to draw her and her family closer to Himself... but I know it is going to be a long road. Would you please pray for her physical healing and that the Lord would sustain her through the months ahead... where I know there will be many difficult times. Thank you so much for lifting her up to our Heavenly Father.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Right now, I just wanted to quickly update you all that I passed that crazy kidney stone.
I literally had just gotten off the phone with the nurse at my OB's office and she was saying that I should go to urgent care if I needed anything stronger than Tylenol for the pain and to make sure that is what it really was, a kidney stone. I was thinking.... "Hmmmm, I am not a big medication kind of gal, especially pregnant, and I KNOW this is a kidney stone:)"
Probably 5 minutes later, I went to the bathroom and had one ZINGER of a pain... and thought I better check in the toilet... and there she was ( Sorry, I know, probably TMI)
I am just so thankful that I was able to pass it... Yes it was uncomfortable and hurt, but really, this is the 2nd one I have passed and praise God, it isn't THAT bad for me... I remember an friend of mine once saying that he was in the hospital on a morphine drip when he passed a kidney stone the size of a grain of salt. My guess is mine was about almost a 1/2 cm... Honestly, I think it is by the grace of God that they don't hit me nearly as hard as they do many other people.
Don't get me wrong, I don't look forward to doing that again anytime soon:)
Thanks so much for your prayers... the last one took me a month to pass, and this was just a few days... So very thankful for that today!
I will try to post some pics soon of the kids with cousins...:)
Friday, November 19, 2010
At first I thought it was a UTI... but after all my natural remedies and being on an antibiotic for over 24 hours... not much has changed. The only other time that I have had where my body didn't respond to the remedies and an antibiotic was when I passed the kidney stone early in the morning... the day I found our I was pregnant with Samuel.
I just wanted to throw it out here on the blog so that you all could pray... We are out of town, and it is making it a bit hard to fully enjoy all the relatives:) Please pray that it would move quickly, (I am drinking so much water, I feel like I might float away:) that it won't be too big to pass on my own... and most of all that this precious little guy inside of me will be protected.
By the way... I am finally feeling him move a lot more....:) I love it, it melts my heart completely... I have thought I have been feeling him move the last 4 weeks... but just such tiny movements... now I am getting bigger ones:) Yay!
This may sound crazy (totally different than the natural childbirth instructor, birth doula, that I used to be) but, I am praying that they can induce me a couple of weeks early, like maybe 38 or so weeks, that is the plan at least with my Doctor and the High Risk doctor. That would make 19 weeks 1/2 way there... I will be 21 weeks on Sunday... I am so thankful to God to be this far... but I can hardly believe it.
I will keep you posted on the kidney stone... Thank you so much for your prayers!
Thursday, November 18, 2010
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO HEAR THE BELLY LAUGHS THAT ABOUND IN OUR HOME. AFTER TIMES OF GREAT SADNESS IT IS SO NICE TO HEAR THE GIGGLES THAT MAKE THEIR WAY AROUND THE HOUSE... LIKE MUSIC TO MY EARS!
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Friday, November 12, 2010
Monday, November 8, 2010
Jojo and Hope as Chocolate and white milk...
We have been soooooo busy. I don't really see it letting up anytime soon. We had a great time with my in laws here last week, they were very gracious to help with meals... what a HUGE help. A lot of days I just feel like throwing eggs or pancakes on the table. (But didn't really want to do that for company:) I am feeling so much better as far as nausea goes, but it does still come and go. I am just really tired... but I am so thankful to have the gift of this baby making me tired... so thankful!
I loved the service we had for Orphan Sunday. We actually had a new girl that has been coming to the teen group at church who wanted to be baptized. It was so special... had me choked up for sure. It is just so cool to see God working in her life... so cool. I love to see Greg's passion for the orphan, the needy, the lonely. I prayed the Lord worked in hearts to move/give fo themselves on behalf of those who need so much.
It just breaks my heart to think that there are so many kids that do with out what most of us just take for granted... a mom and dad... a family who will stick by them... love... compassion and care... and so very much more. And the thing is they are the innocent ones... they didn't ask for that to be their lot in life to be without a mother, father, or family. Oh my, so much for my heart to take in sometimes. Our reality is so much different... I just keep coming back to the fact that we are so spoiled and warped here in America in so many ways. We don't really have a clue as to how so much of the rest of the world lives each and every day.
We are gearing up to have some kids stay with us this Tuesday and Wednesday that are a part of an international choir that is doing a concert at our church. The kids are so excited!
Just thankful these days for the blessings of being home with my kids... getting to experience life with them and Greg each day... each day is a gift.
Praying in earnest tonight for my sweet friend in NE in labor right now... and my sister in law who will have surgery this Wednesday!
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Our church is celebrating Orphan Sunday this coming Sunday...
This week I am incredibly thankful for...
3. The gift of adoption... for because of it I have become a mother again:) What a precious gift!
(I am numbering all the things I am thankful for right from the start so I can sort of keep track of all of my blessings... may seem a bit odd... but I am sort of weird like that... that way in my mind, it will be somewhat organized:)
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
I have to tell you that celebrating Samuel's 2nd birthday in Heaven didn't really go at all like I had thought or planned. We had been so busy, the house was a mess, and unfortunately there was work that just had to get done. Louis, had his confirmation at church on Sunday, and we were having company so there were things that had to be accomplished. But honestly, it is funny how even in that, a part of me has to trust that was how the Lord wanted it to go for us... maybe He knew I would need a bit of a distraction during the two days. So I trust that it went how the Lord wanted it to go.
Mommy never stops thinking about you and being thankful for your short life inside of me. Samuel, you changed me forever, in ways I never knew possible. Even though you never breathed a breath of life on this earth, your life mattered to us. God created you, you were fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator of the universe. He knit you together inside of me. I feel so blessed that I got the chance to carry you for your time here on this earth. We loved you from the minute we knew you were a coming... we treasured our 9 months and 1 day with you. I would do it all again in a heartbeat, pain and all, just to have you a part of our life again. What a gift you were to us.
WATCHING OUR BALLOONS FLY AWAY...
JOJO HELPED MAKE SAMUEL'S CAKE, WE OPTED FOR 3 LAYERS THIS YEAR INSTEAD OF 6....
SO THANKFUL FOR GOD'S FAITHFULNESS THROUGH IT ALL!