Have you ever felt invisible? Do they?

Have you ever felt invisible?

Can you relate to being in a room full of people and yet feeling all alone?

I have been there... 

Many times in life... I have been there...

I especially remember after Samuel died being in church and feeling totally unnoticed...

Let me rephrase that...

I felt like I was being watched.  I knew I was being watched... I was the lady whose baby had died... I felt the eyes on me... yet even with tears overflowing out of my eyes...Most days there wasn't a response... I felt totally unnoticed... 

I felt almost invisible... 

Then I didn't just feel totally broken hearted... but I felt brokenhearted and worthless...

Sad, but true...

(Praise God for His amazing healing and faithfulness to restore what was once broken and rebuild a shattered life into something beautiful again... He is soooooo good!)

Have you ever felt that way... 

Invisible...

Unnoticed...

Maybe even that you life might be lacking worth???  I would guess that most of us have at one point or another...

What about Tony?  How did he feel as his life reached a near life or death point severely malnourished and abused?

Or precious Jackson... How does he feel being deaf and having CP?

Or this sweet sweet baby Joshua with severe burns from a house fire... Will he feel invisible as he grows and watches how people may stare?  

(I love how every time I looked at him, he just got cuter and cuter... I noticed those burns less and less with each passing moment... Oh how I miss this baby so much... my heart is aching to hold him again and hear his amazing laugh...  He is such a precious gift!)

While in Uganda I was  talking with our leader about how I was feeling embarrassed and convicted that  I knew people at our current church that had special needs children... Some of them similar to the kids we had been working with daily at The Gem Foundation, and I had yet to approach those kids... I had spoken with their parents... but sadly not taken the time to reach out directly to the children... and speak directly with them....

Our leader right away said, "They must feel so invisible..."  

In that moment... My heart broke... 

Lord forgive me for the times I have made any of your precious children, young or old, perfectly healthy or not, in their right mind or not... feel invisible... 

I mention about my feelings after Samuel died, not with any ill intent... but  only because I get it... 

In people's own uncomfortableness with me and my baby dying they found it difficult to reach out to me...

And I have done the same thing... in a different situation... but ultimately, a very similar thing... probably having the same exact result... Because many times things have been outside my comfort zone, I haven't reached out... I haven't made an effort... I've stepped away... and...

The end  result has probably been me hurting those people many times over... ouch!

My heart breaks over that... is embarrassed by it... And thankfully recognizes it and wants to change. it... 

Does Bethany look invisible?

What a beautiful smile and and wonderful JOY that radiates from her... 

Does Jerome look invisible?

What tender love and Care Liz shows him each day... showing him... You are worth it!

What about this precious new little guy?  Does he look invisible?

Day after Day I watched Albert tickle, feed, and push the older boys in cars... all these young boys beaming in delight at the experience of knowing that someone loves them...

What about Shafik?  Living with Autism, does He look invisible to you?

Cradled in the arms of his caregiver... He knows he is home!

What about Tony... severely malnourished and abused... does he appear invisible?

This Tony, with eyes that captured my heart... continually with Rita by his side (and Maciej never far away while we were there:) tenderly being shown... he matters... His life is precious... His life is of unbelievable worth to God and us....

Each and everyday, we may not know fully what those around us are feeling...

Each and everyday... we can make someone feel special, loved, cared for and precious...
We can cast away our judging human eyes...
And see them how God sees them...

Oh the lessons that God impressed upon my heart while in Uganda...

I am excited... I have been in conversation with one of the moms from our church who has a child like some of the kids we cared for in Uganda... first I apologized... Then I asked to hear more about this precious boys story...

I can't wait to get connected with them...

I am so thankful for God's goodness to me...
I am so thankful that He continually teaches me...
And I am so thankful for all the different, unique, amazing precious people He uses in my life to teach me...

Watoto Suubi... What a vision!

Watoto Suubi campus... What fore thought and vision... And how beautiful to see it being put into practice!!

This is the church over looking the rolling mountains and hills near Kampala...

Watoto has been caring for the orphans of Uganda for the last 20 years...

They don't do adoptions but rather the focus is to provide homes for children...

They have over 3000 orphans in their care... At three different campuses.

They have house foster moms who care for 8 children, all different ages and care for them until adulthood... So on the Suubi campus there are about 125-150 homes built to care for the kids...

They are built in little clusters almost like a small neighborhood.  It is gorgeous... Up at the top of the campus they have their  primary school, the high school, and vocational school.  

They do a beautiful job and really are equipping these kids to be productive adults... Most importantly they are training them up in The Lord!  

Here is part of the team with Maureen and a bunch of her kids...

 She moved to Watoto with her two biological kids 14 years ago as a single mom... 

This is her home... Nice, but not in any way fancy...

Running water?? Yes..

Toilet??? Yes?

Beds for everyone??   Yes

Lots of love???  Yes!!!

Electricity???  No!! 

So, Watoto provides much better living conditions than many of these moms or kids would have otherwise, but it is not lavish in any way, shape or form...

They provided a meal for us... It was wonderful Ugandan food... Made by Maureen and all the kids:)

What a sacrifice of time and resources for us...

We were so honored!  We LOVED visiting with them, playing dominoes and soccer, and sharing a beautiful meal!  

Maureen and I sat together the other day at Emma's introduction and she was keeping me informed of all that was happening during the introduction and what it all meant:) she has such a beautiful loving heart... These kids are blessed to call her mom!

On the way to their home we passed this house built by a church in the town I grew up in... How cool is that?

Kim and our beautiful  friend Maureen!

Truthfully, I have such a heart for adoption, I never understood the philosophy of Watotos ministry...

After seeing more of the country, hearing more orphans stories, and seeing the ministry in practice... 

It is a beautiful place!

It is a beautiful ministry... Doing amazing things for the mothers and kids of Uganda!  I am TOTALLY Impressed... The baby home is one of the best I have seen here in Uganda!

The vision that was put forth here years ago is amazing and the follow through and blessing from The Lord so inspiring!  

It really challenged my thinking for my own life, my own family, and even for Emma and the Gem Foundation... Emma has great vision... Astounding for someone so young!

I am seeing fully today that with God nothing is impossible!!  

LOVE IT!!! 

Emma, josh, and the gems... A life calling...

This precious couple, Emma and josh amaze me... 

Truly, the first day at The Gem Foundation I was pretty overwhemed by my own selfishness just by watching them with the kids...

Emma has found the PERFECT man to share this AFRICAN MSSIONARY  life with...

 He is kind, funny, adventurous, God fearing, on fire for The Lord, will be a great dad to Emma's little man... 

And most importantly, here in Africa where she serves, he is loving, kind and "IS IN" fully  caring for the gems, the 24 kids that live at the Gem Foundation...

Here they were together scoping out land to build for the future Gem Foundation...

This isn't a calling for now... This is a life calling as they see it... Not leaving Africa... But living and serving here for life... Unless God were to do something else... 

They want to care for these kids for life... 

A few of the kids may be able to adopted at some point.  In Uganda witchcraft is wide spread and special needs kids are considered to be a cursed... So most wouldn't be able to be resettled back with family... So this is home for them... Most likely for a long time..

Or forever....

And Emma and josh are totally embracing that wholeheartedly...

And that BLOWS me away...shows me my selfish heart... And leaves me pretty in awe  of these two young people...

Emma caring for baby O... 5 years old but wears 9 mo clothing... He was severely malnourished... But has a smile that will melt your heart! 

Emma, only 21, founded the Gem Foundation and already, only 6 mos later, has filled her home... They are out of space...  And trust me, I am sure she could fill many more homes with kids...

The need is that BIG here in Uganda...

She is amazing, considers these her kids,  loves them dearly, puts them first...

But what impresses me the most is that she is right in there with the nannies in their day to day care... Feeding them, holding the. And loving on them... 

She REALLY knows what is going on with each of them...

She has a staff of 25 people, including nannies, cooks, nurses, and social workers... And they are kinder and more loving than any staff I have seen at an orphanage over here... 

And that says A LOT!! 

These are special needs kids with a lot if big needs and costly needs... It is much more costly than a traditional typical orphanage caring for healthy kids...

Emma and josh have followed the Lords calling on their life and are loving and embracing the serving the special needs kids here...

They are searching for new land to they can better care for the kids, provide more long term housing and housing in general for more kids, farm (to be more self sustaining), to be better stewards and not have to spend money on rent, and  be out from the terrible pollution in Kampala (but still minutes from a hospital). 

They know God will provide all...  Would you please pray for them and the precious kids they care for??

They are so humble and sincere... 

Check out Emma's blog at 

www.emonamission.blogspot.com

To know how to pray specifically for them and if God so leads you to donate towards the AMAZING work they are doing here in Uganda😊

I know that any money given is truly always going to where the need is so very great!

VBS in the village

VBS in the village

Pastor john , whom we have worked with for 3 years has a beautiful philosophy of ministry... The church is to care for the orphans in Uganda....

So he builds a church with an orphanage attached to it.... 

He has done that 15 times...

The kids playing duck duck chicken and hot potato:). 

In the far background, You can see the village women filling up water from the new well, installed within the past year:). What a blessing to the community!  

It's dancing time:)

3 orphanages were brought together for our day of VBS... Totaling about over 80 kids when you included the village kids:) 

Everyone was anxious to get inside and get started.... They knew there were balloons to pop... about 125 of them... That was a noisy, but really fun 5 minutes:)

We sang, danced, and gave lots of hugs!

My sweet Lawrence... My little buddy each time I return...

The teens told the story of David and Goliath... Focusing on the giants in our lives and how with God all things are possible... 

There are a lot if giants in the life of an orphan...  Can you imagine?   loneliness, fatherlessness, hunger, danger, sickness... I could go on and on... 

Thank The Lord for Pastor John and the care they provide for all of these kids... 

And most importantly, they are taught about Jesus, discipled, and raised up to be leaders Barack in their communities...

Bubbles for everyone...

And a very small toy for each to keep and play with as well...

Isn't she precious... Little grace, the smallest child at the 3 orphanages... 

The way she clung to all the older girls totally reminded me of my Anna and Isaiah...

It was a long day of VBS... But a beautiful day...

When we returned home it was off to the baby home to feed, change and put little ones to bed:) 

Day one...

Disclaimer... Typing on phone... Excuse all typos:):)

Day one... 

Overwhemed on many levels... I knew God was going to work and me... And He wasted no time:) 

We spent lots of time at The Gem Foundation today... A special needs orphanage in Kampala (more on The Gem Foundation another day:) 

Meet Colin... Smiliest kid EVER!!!  

Louis and his new friend Shafiek:)

Here is how God worked today...

In all honestly, my experience with special needs is pretty limited... This morning before we left I was reading in Matthew about how Jesus healed the lame man at the pool... Immediately it dawned on me that I really needed to pray for Gods will to be done in healing these special needs kiddos I was about to meet...

I know with God anything is possible... And His will may be a complete healing here or may be in Heaven. It may be an emotional healing.  It may be a healing of one specific problem... 

I was blown away by these precious kids... Many with cerebral palsey, hydrocephalus, autism, and much more... 

But my heart was particularly drawn to a few children...

A 9 mo old who has been severely burned... So much so, that both of his hands are missing... Oh the long road of healing he has in front of him... And yet he is so sweet and joyful...

I was also drawn to 2 precious boys that were severely malnourished...one being 5 and looking more like a 9 mo old...  Little O, so precious...

And the other sweet little T.  he is 12 years old but wears a size 4...  you read that right... 12 years old, looking more like a 4 year old...

How does this happen?  How does it go on that long?  How does it go THAT FAR?  T is the most recently added Gem to the home... He was also abused... I truly never realized or thought completely through the amount of damage  that is done through malnutrition... Or more like starvation in this case...

I was immediately struck by God to speak the truths of His Word and love to T... 

You are so loved..  God created you for a very special purpose... You are fearfully and wonderfully made... I know that how he has suffered in the past he may not be "feeling" those truths... 

 He has telling eyes... Even though he can't speak, he still uses his face to communicate, even his eyebrows... He even gave me the slightest smile...

He broke me... 

No one deserves even the smallest dose of what he has experienced in life... This treasure who can barely do anything, can barely move from a tight fetal position because that is how he has sat for FAR TOO LONG is a BEAUTIFUL PRECIOUS  creation of God with a life purpose as great as yours or mine... Who knows maybe far greater than yours or mine... 

Do you believe that?  I am not sure what I believed fully before today... Before I saw it RIGHT in front of me with my own eyes... The toll of abuse, neglect, starvation on a precious little child...

He wasn't an accident... He deserves  to be loved, cared for, and treasured...

I feel blessed beyond measure and so privileged to be able to be a small part of that care and love these next two weeks...

Little T... I won't ever forget you... Part of your life  purpose was to change me... To teach me more about the infinite unconditional love of our Heavenly father... 

You are loved...

You are treasured...

You are handsome...

I am praying for your continued healing... Physically, emotionally... May God's perfect will now be done in your life...

You are now home T...I know you will be well cared for and deeply loved at the Gem Foubdation... No more to fear sweet boy...

no more to fear...

Safe on the ground in Kampala Uganda

Safe on the ground in Uganda...

So very thankful...

So fun to see kids reunited and having a ball...

Heading to the gem foundation soon...

Can't wait to meet the gems...

Heart overflowing for smooth flights and that my nerves were pretty good:):)

Actually had a warm shower.

Actually had a shower for that matter and not a tub bath:)

Loved being reunited with dear friends and team members...

Many prayers for my family back home (what a tearful goodbye:(

Interesting all the medical ministry of health things they do before you could enter the country this year...

Ready to hit the ground running to love some dear precious fatherless kids today...

Who am I to receive such a privilege and honor to care for them, love them and share Jesus with them?

All glory to HIM!!!

The countdown is on....

 The countdown is on... only 36 days till we set foot back on Ugandan soil (God willing)

The plans for our meals for missions fundraiser are underway... Which meals the chaos of the next 2 weeks has begun... I think we have about 53 people signed up which means we will make about 530 meals that day... We are hoping for about 70 to sign up... So we will see... We know God will provide...

One of the highlights of last year was seeing the tremendous growth of my boys compared to the trip we had taken the year before... Our leader stretches the kids to get out of their comfort zone, share from their hearts, and even take a leadership role at times...

He sees the kids as an intricate part of the team and gives us a huge range of experiences.  He does not shy away from hard work, hard things to see, the harsh reality of living in the slums of a 3rd world country.

 I wouldn't trade that for anything... A precious life experience for myself and my boys...

Can you see the fly on the little girls lip that I am holding?   Sweet baby girls watching the boys play soccer in the slums of Kampala...

Louis and his special friend getting water from the water hole... We are praising God that these kids no longer drink from that stagnant unhealthy water hole, but from a well dug right on their property... 

Those eyes...

Those feet, having been chewed on by rats while he slept... 

Can you even imagine???

This little guy ate the rest of my nutella and peanut butter sandwich... He hid behind this tree so he could have the last few bites to himself... Isn't he beyond precious???

I know this trip will be different in many ways... We are thrilled to be able to spend some of our time serving at The Gem Foundation, a special needs orphanage that our 21 year old friend Emma opened this past summer.  

I have to be honest, I know that the Lord is going to use this place especially, to grow me... Sadly, I haven't had a great  deal of experience working with kids or people with special needs...Sadly, It isn't really within my comfort zone... I am embarrassed to admit that... 

I am not scared... maybe more intimidated is the word...I am just not sure what to do, what is safe and appropriate when handling them... But I can not wait to love on and care for these precious kids that the Lord created and loves.  And I know that with some direction and leading the Lord is going to grow my heart, my love for them, and my understanding of how to care for them... He is so good like that... And I am so looking forward to it... 

Already our hearts are praying... "Lord, break out hearts for what breaks yours..." That is our hearts cry... That we might be able to catch a glimpse of how God sees things, us, the orphans, the homeless, and that our hearts will be moved  and be motivated to GO and DO all because we love our Savior and want others to know and love HIM too...

So the countdown is on... Lord willing, 36 days and our feet will hit the ground running on the red dirt soil of Uganda... 

Never too old or too young... to be used by our Lord...

I have to share with you about....

something amazing...

someone amazing...

who is allowing an amazing AWESOME GOD to work through her to do 

amazing things for HIM!!!

Here is our sweet precious missionary friend Emma... 

(Can't help but smile at the two of them... as Louis was handing over our gift of a chicken to Emma for being such a great host... good times trying to make sure that thing didn't get loose in the van filled with our Go Team last January... oh the laughter:)

Talk about a photo that screams... MIRACULOUS!!!  EVERY SINGLE  time I look at the following picture , I catch my breath and my heart is overwhelmed my the miraculous power of God to heal and work in people's lives... Oh, how He loves the orphan and us all!

Here is Emma with her sister Ruby on the day they discovered her at the orphanage... Extremely sick and only weighing 6lbs at a year... Can you imagine, 6 lbs. at a year?  

The second picture is of ruby a year later... At that point she had been adopted, was Emma's sister and had clearly put on a few very healthy pounds:):) praise God!!!

Emma's Parents remember Emma telling them she was going to be a missionary to Uganda at the tender age of 6 and even caught her on video saying that very thing at her 8th birthday... 

Can you imagine your kids saying that at 6 or 8 years old???

And what I love about her family is that they never discouraged or doubted her... but only sought to have her follow whatever the Lord might call her to do... 

Again... amazing!!!

(As a mom to a 17 year who feels the Lord calling him to missions... my heart is already being tugged at... Ultimately, I want him to follow the Lord's calling wherever that might be... but my human side says, "Lord, ... if it is your will... ... not too far away... but your will be done:):)"

(Here is part of our team from January with Emma, some of her staff, and our driver before we left to come home)

Well Emma's dreams and the Lord's plans for her life are finally being fulfilled:)

God is so good and to see Him work through her in Uganda is so inspiring... 

Did I mention she is only 20?

(We are NEVER too old or too young to do the Lord's work:)

Last week her home for special needs orphans opened it doors and was filled with 11 boys... 

The opening of the Gem Foundation has been long in the works...

But now there are many kids to be loved on, cared for, and provided for in the walls of that home.

Please considering checking out her website

www.thegemfoundation.com

to see the amazing kids at the home...

to see the work the Lord is doing through one young humble WILLING servant...

to know how to better pray for Emma and her ministry...

And who knows maybe the Lord will touch your heart to maybe help the gem foundation in some way as they care for the special needs treasures in Uganda...

(Emma, in January at the Christmas party that our Go Team hosted for over 70 kids from 3 different orphanages) 

The Love of Jesus shines right out of her... I love it... and her!