I am a mom first...

7 poopy diapers... one explosion up the back...

One 4 years old with her fingers stuck in a hole far too tiny for said fingers...

sleepover parties with homemade pancakes and muffins...

7 loads of laundry...

homeschooling 4 kids...

changing infants clothes... again... and again... and again... (wow this little guys spits up a lot:)

cuddling through episodes of Thomas or veggie Tales...

books before naps...

a forgotten photo shoot... epic fail for 15 year old son and mom...

a late night run for apples,whip cream, and snickers for the oldest 2... (have you ever had that dessert... yummo!)...

helping daughter learn how to move beyond stick people... :)

helping 4 year old try on her new Ugandan dress you bought for her... newly uncovered due to cleaning for move...

rubbing oils on feet before bed...

snacking on sweet pickles and watching gold rush with your first born...

Sorting though folders of paperwork from 2 adoptions, trips to Uganda, bibles studies gone through...

Honestly, when all is said and done... when the house is finally quiet and I can finally get some packing done until the wee wee hours of the morning... when day after I feel at moments like I am running on fumes... when in my head I feel the burden of a to do list as long as the mighty Mississippi, and when in my heart I feel the looming sadness of too many goodbyes that I can already sense the bitter taste in my mouth.  When all is said and done during the day light hours I am a mom first... I feel the moments slipping by so quickly...  Moments in our home here in Oklahoma that will soon be a distant memory.

 I am nostalgic... maybe too much so... I can not help but think... this is the last time my kids will play on that swing set before the buyers come to pick it up (man we had a great swing set here!!!) or we may never hang out and have dinner with these friends like this again. (it will be different next time, we will be passing through) or these are the last few times I will see the kids running barefoot having water fights with the neighbors here.  But even here amidst the crazy amount of work that needs to be done, I find myself wanting to cherish the last bits of memory making to be had here both at home and with friends...

So so thankful for the gift of sharing life with my precious family and such precious dear friends here in this place...

Sweet going away present...

 

 A few days ago I was blessed with the sweetest gift from a new friend of mine, Becky.  She showed up at our church a few months ago and there was an instant connection between us.   We have both experienced the loss of a child and she has quite the amazing life story.  What a precious heart she has...

It was so good of the Lord to bless me with a new friend even just months before we set out to move to a new place. 

She made the most beautiful picture displays for our new house... to help us remember our time in Oklahoma:)  Precious precious memories of a difficult, but very blessed time here in Oklahoma...

She was so so sweet to include our Samuel and even had the kindness and put the thought into it to include the 2 precious boys we would love to call our own from Uganda:)  That was like a cherry on top.  

The house is listed with a realtor and the boxes are filling up the garage...

Our last Sunday at our church here in a little over a week...

Lots of mixed emotions flying around here:)  God is faithful through it all:)

One at a time...

 This sweet little smile...

 

 And those luscious lips...

 

And even these grumpy moments are the sweet spots amidst the crazy busy days right now:):)

 

One day at a time... is how we are taking it... and truly my prayer for the last few weeks has been that the Lord would multiply the minutes of my days to somehow allow me to get everything done that needs to get done...

 

At this point... I feel like we are in decent shape as far as the packing goes... but I am not naive enough to not recall that with every move near the end, the panic sets in and it usually always comes down to some "throw it in whatever box you can find" moments:):)  We aren't there yet:):) 

 

By the grace of God I had 3 precious friends come and help me get the majority of the kitchen packed the other day...It was a huge blessing...

 

Tomorrow the house gets listed with a realtor... we were trying it for a couple of weeks by owner... and we had a lot of action... but no offers... now it is go time... we will most likely be out in about a month...  I know God has the exact people for our home... and He will bring them at the perfect time... but our prayer is that it happens sooner rather than later:):)  Isn't that every one's prayer when they are selling a house?? 

 

Last night Anna, Jojo and I were sitting in Samuel's garden... Here are some random thoughts from a mommy with a child in Heaven...

 

There is a weird difficulty with leaving this house and place.  I am so thankful that we didn't bury Samuel here and that we can take his ashes with us.  I clearly know exactly where he is... but for some reason there is comfort in knowing his remains can come with us...  I also have this heaviness of heart leaving behind the place where he was with us... I remember so many moments of when we first lived here when he was still alive inside of me... the long nightly walks... relaxing baths in my tub... the kids painting my belly in the kitchen... a seminary wives reunion here just a few weeks before he died...so many more and all such precious memories...  I have shed lots of tears over remembering Samuel here in this place as of late...

 

 

But with that too comes the hard memories of my absolute heartbreak when I knew for sure he was gone as I was trying to get him to move while resting in my bed... the panic... the deep, devastating grieving I did right here in this house... The loneliness... Oh, that was so hard... I can hardly believe I survived it at times... There is a part of me that is happy to leave that place behind...yet it reminds me of him... and at the same time and in a weird way ... I love that about this house...

 

So we plug ahead... home school conference tomorrow and ordering our books so we are ready for the new school year... Louis has at least 6 more photo shoots he is trying to squeeze in before we leave (which means he needs transportation:) and loads of packing packing packing... We can't forget the awesome finalization of Isaiah's adoption next week... we are so thankful for that opportunity and CAN.NOT.WAIT!:) 

 

A last bit of news... our family was blessed with a new nephew this past week... Isaac Nathaniel... born to my sister and her husband... we are so thankful for his safe arrival!



So grateful for them...

These two young men are growing up WAY TOO QUICKLY!

Spending 2 weeks with them in Uganda opened up my eyes in new ways as to how the Lord has gifted and blessed them...


Louis... loving on those kids with reckless abandon...
proclaiming at the top of his lungs, "I love Jesus!!!"  While dressing a room full of kiddos at the baby home... And the parroting kids declared loudly back, "I love Jesus!!!"
The tears that flowed saying goodbye to those ones that were extra special to him.
His gift is to love, talk, engage, show compassion to... I could go on and on... He is a social bug and a very funny guy... very much a people person...


Caleb, the serious thinker... calmly and quietly receiving the hand of a former little street boy in His as we walked the 2 miles to church one morning.
Lovingly feeding babies whose pants were soiled through and through... never batting an eye...
Getting right in there, playing soccer with 3 different groups of former street boys...
I will never forget the little boy who latched onto Caleb big time ... he was really too old to be held but would not let Caleb put him down and Caleb just held him and held him.
My hard working brink laying boy...

I can not tell you how proud I am of them.

They work so hard taking turns each week, one going early with Greg to work on Sunday mornings up at church, mowing lawns in the neighborhood, ministering to orphans and street boys in Uganda... working for a neighbor each week (in fact they are both getting up at 5:15 in the morning tomorrow to help out a neighbor...

 I know that leaving our home now for a new city in just a few short weeks is not easy for them.  It is probably hardest on them.  And we had a few rough days of sadness, worry, and anxiousness in the beginning.  But now, they have chosen to embrace it!  I know that they will miss their friends and youth group A LOT... But they have had a great attitude about it and I really appreciate that.  I know that there will be bumps a long the way...but I am so thankful for their willingness to go where God wants their dad and also where he wants them to serve as well.  I am so thankful for these great young men:)