Jesus in Every Book of the Bible

I have to first off to please excuse all the errors in my last posts and my coming posts. I am doing them all from an IPod so basically it is like I am texting the whole thing. It will auto fill words and also is really hard to edit things...so please bear with me.

Hello friends. Not too much is new unless you consider my eldest son and I are getting reedy to watch a "New to us movie". The Ultimate Gift...together:)

Greg has taken to sleeping in the extra bedroom the night before he preaches since I have started to snore while pregnant and he isn't sleeping as well:( It actually has given the kids a chance to have sleepovers with mama and papa. I miss my honey though:)

I got a call from our insurance company yesterday checking on me after being hospitalized. She was a nurse and asked me tons of questions. She also clearly stated that given all of my risk factors with various issues with this pregnancy...5
previous perfect pregnancies until losing Samuel full term, the Meds I am on... She basically said that she doesn't see any reason why they wouldn't cover a hospitalization at this point. I know it sounds crazy that is what I would prefer, but I want to make 100 percent sure G and I are doing everything we can for Levi. So I may seek a 2 nd opinion early next week if possible.

I wanted to post this awesome video of my godson jack. It is funny because the above video clip has gotten tons of hits on god tube. I have had a couple of people send me the clip ( recognizing the name of our awesome church, Salem, from our time there) asking if by chance
We knew them??

Ah... Yeah... He is my godson.

It was kind of funny!

Well I wanted to share it with you all... I was personally amazed! I pray it blesses and encourages you today!!

Don't forget to pause the playlist on the side so that you can hear it:).

Now I am obsessed...

Today was an interesting office visit with the high risk doctor ... To say the least. First off we stayed the night at our friend house right down themstreet from the hospital... And again tonight as I have another
appointmemt tomorrow. We are so thankful that they let us stay:). They have been incredibly gracious!! And the kids have had a ball. We would have had our hands full on the roads for sure from our house as there was some ice under the snow and they don't do anything for the roads here. All the schools in the area are closed again tomorrow. I think we got maybe 2 inches of snow...

The high risk doctor said more of the exact same thing that my doctor said. "It all is fine...shouldn't be something that progresses quickly without being caught by the monitoring and tests. I know she truly is trying to help put my mind at ease and I appreciate that... But I truly think that unless you have lost a baby... I don't think it can be fully understand... Because I have seen and heard now that what I feel is totally normal when you have lost a baby already. I think that our situation of Faiths baby, the one that we were going to adopt being stillborn too, just makes all these "highly unlikely"'things to happen more likely... We have seen it in the past... So sometimes the impossible seems possible if that makes sense.

She did tell me she thought I was obsessing over it... Hmmm that made me feel a little "nuts" so to speak. I did learn that there is no stage 4 with the aging placenta thing... 3 is the last stage... That left Greg feeling more at peace. Me, not so much. And apparently I have an increased risk of a placental abruption than normal. It is still unlikely, like maybe a 1 percent chance. Please pray against that as that would be really bad, seeing as we are 40 minutes from the hospital.

She did agree for me to be seen 3 times a week for all the testing on Levi. So Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays we will be checked. That makes me feel better that they have a better chance of catching something since it won't be as long between visits. I REALLY appreciate being able to do that.

Believably or not, I actually feel a sense of peace tonight. Thank you Lord!!! I have needed it.

She also said there is no way they would let memo past 37 weeks, and that I probably won't make it there. So at the latest, we should meet Levi the 15th of March, but most likely earlier. Sounds good to me.

Continually crying out to God for peace!!

Continually thankful for all the ways people have helped lately!!

Continually thankful for the prayers lifted on mine and Levi's behalf!!

Continually placing this little guy in the Lord's hands... Can't wait till he physically is in mine:)

Talk with the doc...

My Doctor called this evening on his way home from work... He had an emergency surgery and a c- section this afternoon, so it was late before he could call.

He said the high risk doc wasn't concerned. The appearance of the placenta isn't a sign of how well it is functioning. The tests on Levi show that and those are all good at this point. He said it isn't something that changes overnight... It happens slowly.

He could sense that nothing he said really put me at ease. ( I just have a hard time believing that I couldn't be an exception to what seems to be the rule.). And personally if it needs to get to the point of showing problems in Levi's growth or something, that is too late for me. My doctor had said before that he would have no problem putting me in the hospital anytime. But the high risk doctor said she didn't feel like insurance would cover it at this point. I really like my doctor and the high risk doctor and I want them to know that I really value their opinions... It is just extremely hard after all that we have been through to know that there are issues with my placenta... Yet apparently it is no big deal. I want them to know that I am so grateful for their help and care. But as Levi's mom I have do all I can to make sure he is safe.

I have an appointment with the high risk doctor on Thursday morning. Of course we are expecting ice and snow and being that we live 40 minutes from the hospital and they do nothing with the roads here in bad weather, getting there will be interesting... Being from Wisconsin it is still a little strange to me that they don't have any plows here at all. It is really important to me to make sure we get to the appointment as this is when they check him to make sure the placenta issues aren't affecting Levi at all.

So that is where we are at today. we are so thankful that it seems like none of us have caught the bug Anna had. Thank you Lord! It
seems like this bug is sweeping through other families! So we are so thankful our immune builder tincture seems to be doing it's job this
year. :). Greg works from home tomorrow just to be available if needed:).

I am praying for the Lord to cover us in His peace tonight. Praying you are all doing well also. I miss being able to keep track of all of hour blogs from this little IPod... I will catch up...

Still at home...

We are thankful tonight that little Levi passed his biophysical profile with flying colors:). Way to go little man!!

It was hilarious, during the ultrasound, you could see him yawning over and over again. Our sweet tech even caught the funniest picture of Levi when was sticking his tongue out.

The other good thing was that my placenta looked the same as it did last Thursday.

G and I had a good talk with my OB. He said that he will call the high risk doc tomorrow and then will call me after he visits with her. He was fine with sending me home today. He said there would be some increased risks for me if I am hospitalized like... Blood clots, infection.... Although both would be unlikely. He did say of course that Levi would be getting more monitoring if I was there.

I asked him (knowing fully that he can't make any predictions) if we were for sure looking at a premature baby? He said he didn't feel there was anyway that I would see 38-39 weeks. He said 36 was a possibility... That made me feel good. At least he didn't think at all that anything is imminent:) and we could even see week 36 with the possibility of very little nicu time. That would be awesome! I know the Lord already knows this little guys birthday.

So tomorrow, little miss Hope will spend the day with my sweet friend Shelley and family and the kids and I will crank on the school work from bed until the doctor calls again. Can I just say my rearend is really getting sore after sitting so much...

Small price to pay for this sweet little baby:).

Thanks for your prayers!!

A short update:)

I go back to the doctor tomorrow morning early so I will try to update after that....

But I have been doing a lot of thinking.... what else do you do when you are sitting in bed 24/7:)

I did call my doctor back last Friday and had him answer some more of my questions.

He reassured me that usually this placenta thing isn't a quick over night change sort of thing... he said we would see signs in Levi that if it wasn't still functioning would affect Levi. (Really after all we have been through... that is too late for me... I don't want to see signs in him that he isn't getting what he needs... does that make sense??)

We talked about putting me back in the hospital. I informed him that we are 40 minutes from the hospital if we are at home... he said we will discuss it tomorrow and that he can put me in at any time... he just wanted to buy me more time for our sake.

So I am packing a few things just in case that is where I end up after my visit.

Par for the course... Levi wiggles a good amount during the day... but he continues to do his usual... never moves at night... by morning I am usually still quite tired from staying awake trying to get him to move...listening for his heartbeat on the doppler... and just becoming restless and uncomfortable with his lack of movement.

I know this is his consistent pattern, but it is hard.... knowing Samuel died sometime during the night and I woke up with no movement... Even knowing Levi's life is in God's hands.... IT IS SO HARD NOT TO FEEL RESPONSIBL for this little guy... I think Greg finally understands my feelings with this... as a daddy, it isn't going on inside of him... he relies on me to keep track of that and the doctors.

We just want to do absolutely everything we can to allow Levi the very best outcome possible. I am soooooo thankful to be at 29 weeks tomorrow... but I would love for him to stay put as long as my placenta is working. And I would love to be where I need to be so that if action has to be taken at some point early we are in the very capable hands of doctors:)

So we will see ...

We have lots of people who have offered to help with the kids so I think we have a plan somewhat in place... Thank you Lord for people who are willing to help us during this time. Thanks for your continued prayers...

Besides this Levi news:) We did have Anna down and out throwing up yesterday every 14 minutes for a good 7 hours... I felt so bad for her. Eventually yesterday after noon she could keep a little bit of liquids down. We are praying that no one else gets it. I think it is weird that threw up one time on Monday and then we are all fine till early Saturday morning... It seems like that wouldn't be the same bug. Other than that... not to much happened that I could see from the bedroom... I am so thankful that everyone has adjusted well to mom having to stay put.

I will let you know how tomorrow goes. Thanks for all your prayers!!

Another bit of a twist...

I wanted to give you all an update on my appointment today with the high risk doctor. I am going to lay it all out there and I think I will try to post tomorrow about where I am at spiritually with everything that is going on. ( It was interesting because after I woke up way too early by my standards this morning, 6 am, checked on Levi with the doppler because he didn't seem to be moving enough, then I researched some stillbirth sites... Just to make sure I wasn't missing something.... Then g and I had a huge discussion about our faith in the midst of all of this.... I will try to post on that tomorrow)

Any ways back to the doctors visit. He sure does look precious up there huh? It looks like he has chubby cheeks already:)

My blood pressure was fine... Yay!!! My protein was fine:). Levi did great on the non stress test and the biophysical profile. Yay Levi!!! Those are all great things. Praise God!!!

Here is where it gets dicey for me... Last week she had said that my placenta as aging a little prematurely, but that it was nothing to worry about and that we would monitor it. It was a stage 2 last week. 0 is normal and 4 is the worst. Well low and behold, today we were at a stage 3... Ugh! She really didn't seem concerned, I of course was. She said that the function was still fine because everything pointed to that in the tests done with Levi.

She even went on to say that we could be at stage 4 with tiny black spots where the placenta wasn't working anymore and that if the function was fine and Levi was fine that we wouldn't have to deliver immediately. I just said REALLY??? Just thinking... You have got to be kidding me... How would I be expected to go home OK with that and go on with life as normal??? I know she is the high risk doctor and obviously knows WAY more than me, but she also hasn't lived through what I have.

In my mind I think... How do we know when the placenta will finally not do it's job when it is showing signs of premature aging? Will it be too late? I want to fight for my baby, but struggle when she really has an answer for everything and doesn't seem worried. Am I just over reacting? I feel like his safety is somewhat in my hands ( I know ultimately God is in control:). But I am supposed to be watching for movement changes.... Ummmm yeah! I can be watching him move all around on the ultrasound monitor and barely even feel any of it?? I guess my aging placenta is acting like a buffer to me. It just seems like I can't really win... in my book, I want him to be moving all the time so I know that he is. Does this make sense? Please if anyone has been in my shoes let me know if you have feelings about any of what I said.

So now the whole bp thing seems to be responding great to the Meds and the bedrest... But this placenta thing is more of the concern. Would you please pray with me for a miracle, that my placenta would stop aging right now, continue functioning exactly how it should, and that none of this would affect Levi. Also pray that although he needs to sleep that he would be active and that his movements would reassure me. I am also praying that if something is not right, that I would know it, recognize it and be able to act quickly to get Levi exactly whatever help he needs.

My next appointment is Monday with my regular doc but I will still have the nst ( nonstress test) and the bpp (biophysical profile) done on Levi! it melted my heart to see a 4 d picture of him... MELTED... MY... HEART!!

Lord, please heal my body and allow it to work exactly how it should. Please watch over this little miracle ,Levi, that you have allowed to grow inside of me. Thank you for each day we have with him. Please Lord protect Him from any harm if That is your will Lord! Please give us peace father as we on your timing for his precious little life. FILL us with your peace! We need it Lord! We know that you promise to be with us... please Lord make your presence known and felt in our lives today:)

28 weeks today:)

Yay! We made it to 28 weeks...

Now my next goal is 30 then 32 weeks and so on...

Tomorrow will mark 1 week of bedrest down... It has not been bad at all, thanks to everyones help:). That gives me great hope that we can manage the upcoming weeks with God's help.

I am sitting here at 10:30 at night drinking a glass of juice and eating a banana with chocolate fondue:). Is that bad or what??:). I know I have said it before, but Levi isn't a big mover in general. I know I could be overly sensitive to his movements due to Samuel's situation. Or maybe it is just too early to be feeling more... Or maybe he will just be a laid back baby... I don't know, but, needless to say, he is wiggling around a whole lot more than he was 20 minutes ago:)

I saw the regular doc today. The non stress test (nst) went great and Levi's biophysical profile was fine too. Yay! My bp and protein were also good. So all in all it was a great visit. I see the high risk doctor Thursday to do the same and she will compare everything(placenta and such) to last weeks ultrasound to make sure all is good! I AM so thankful they are keeping a close eye on everything.

If you could add Jojo to your prayers, he seems to have a stomach bug and threw up tonight. We are praying no ones else gets it and thankfully, it was a one time deal for him, so maybe it was something he ate... Hmmm, I hope so!

We enjoyed a beautiful dusting of snow, our first of the year. The kids had a ball outside . I could see them running around the back yard from my bed... They looked so sweet out there. We had fun sharing some hot cocoa in my bed afterwards:).

I'll keep you posted... Hope you are all well too... I am having a hard time checking everyone's blogs from this little IPod. I miss reading them and keeping up with you... Maybe at some point we can get our old lab top working:).

God's peace to you all!