When my knees hit the ground...

Have you ever had those hurts... that still years later... still hurt...  Not all the time... but from time to time... you just can't deny that the hurt remains...

You know you have forgiven those who have hurt you... or it may not even be because of something someone else did, but just due to life circumstances...
Even though you have gotten through the initial shock of the hurt and maybe a lot of the healing...

Regardless of all of that... it doesn't mean your heart has forgotten the hurt...  or doesn't still ache at times because of the hurt... At first like a scab that can be torn off again... or later like scar that is still tender...

So much of those hurts for me reflect back on my time after losing Samuel... Oh how badly my heart hurt, and how broken I was as a person...

PRAISE GOD, He doesn't leave us in our brokenness forever...

Last night we had MEND and we talked a lot about Mother's Day and what that day is like when you don't have all of your children here with you...

This song is one I have been hitting over and over again on my play list as I run lately... It is so beautiful...

"I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground!" Oh, we are so close to the Father's heart when we are in prayer communicating with him... And my babies are with Him... Wow... how thankful I am for that...

And when I am at the table for Communion during church I can't help but think of communing with all the saints here on earth and in Heaven... All of us worshiping the Savior together at the same time... My Babies and I doing the same thing... Them in Heaven and me still here on earth...

 I have thought so often lately of What Heaven is like for Samuel, Joel, or the baby we miscarried...

 I know there isn't any pain or sorrow... I can't help but wonder if there are moms who had to leave their babies too soon that on this Mother's Day are hanging out with my mine...
or are there grandmas that never got to rock their grand babies that will  scoop them  right up on their laps...

 I know it doesn't really matter because whatever is happening...

 It is perfect...

It brings my heart comfort to think of those things...

Enjoy Touch the Sky... by Hillsong United...