The other day... it hit me... something had caused me to in a moment of frustration with other's frustration... not to fully see my very busy, noisy littles as the miracles and blessings that they TRULY are... and my heart was literally broken by it...
I have lived in dark days of grief and sorrow and not knowing if the Lord would bless us with another child... I have lived literally with an ache in my arms longing for them to be filled...
and FILLED THEY HAVE BEEN, only by the grace and goodness of the Lord and I do not, even for the shortest fleeting moment EVER want to not fully take in the HUGE miracle and gift that they are in my life...
EVERY SINGLE MOMENT A MIRACLE... and I mean that wholeheartedly... MIRACLES right FROM THE HAND OF GOD INTO MY LIFE....
In those moments, I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind me that He will equip me for the task of raising these amazing miracles...
He has given us these gifts with all the hootspa, strong will, determination, and wonderful caring personality traits that they possess, and He can more than provide us with the stamina, creativity, and determination to pour into their lives to the very fullest! :)
In those moments I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind me that our God is a mountain moving God who has the power unite strangers to breath life back into frozen embryos... embryos that had been frozen for 5 years to work a living breathing healing joyfilled miracle in our family...
In those moments I want the Lord to continually remind me of the odds that some of our kids have beaten in the womb, in their early months of life that show me the miraculous power of God to heal and spare our children of some possible very difficult life circumstances...
Their healthy lives are truly a Gift from God...
In those moments I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind me that these days while the messes might be BIG and the noise level GREAT... these years truly are so very short and I don't want to take one moment for granted...
In those moments, I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind of the amazing sacrifice their birth parents took part in to grow them for months and months, and then hand them over and make them mine... (Still TOTALLY unbelievable to me!)
In those moments I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind me that I as a mom am the thermostat of the home creating the temperature at which we operate everyday... There is power in the words I choose and the actions that I take...
I want to train these little babes to grow into all that God has planned for them to grow into as little warriors for Him...
In those moments I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind me that being a mom is a HUGE privilege and honor with even greater joys and rewards... Hugs from mustached 5 year old girls, slobbery kisses from dark skinned one year olds, and hilarious laughs given by the constant excitement and joy for life by amazing 3 year olds...
Who could not be filled with joy over the opportunity to experience that ALL DAY LONG:)
In those moments I want the Holy Spirit to continually remind me that...
Truly, I live for an audience of ONE... I want to do my best to be respectful and honoring of others but I don't ever want to let their frustration ever rub off on me and even for a moment to change how I see my kids... I live to please HIM first and foremost...
That I am forgiven for the mistakes I make each and every day....
That His mercies are new every single morning... and I can be filled with His grace to overflowing that His grace might flow right to each of these amazing gifts God has given me...
That I can take EVERY thought captive and make a quick change in attitude when needed:)...
That I can trust Him with their future...
Never would I have dreamed that we would have the opportunity to adopt 3 kids in 2 1/2 years or that it could even be near possible...
I didn't know my future... But the future God had planned was exceedingly and abundantly more than I could have thought or imagined...