Memory Making... funniest photo moment ever... for our family!

What a beautiful day we had taking some new family photos with Ellie Berry of Ellie B Photography....

She was great with keeping the little guys interested and at least looking in the right direction...

Here we are.... a beautiful moment at the Prairie Center nearby...

When all of a sudden out of the silence the Cows right next to us starting mooing up a storm...

It was hilarious... and as you can see in the following pictures Ellie Captured every one's reaction....

Memories made for sure! 

Moments I won't ever forget....

Thanks Ellie, we so enjoyed our visit with you!

Don't blink... They will be all grown up...

And the College visits begin for my boys...
How can we honestly be anywhere near this point in life...
I think I was one of the only moms with a little guy in the back pack on a college tour for the oldest 2 boys... Oh my!!!


The Lake front at the Concordia University campus is beautiful!   It has changed a lot since the days G and I were there together!  I remember many a day studying on a blanket overlooking the lake:)

 Lake Michigan is gorgeous and honestly looked like the carribean that day... Beautiful!

And now we have 2 kids interested in attending school there:)

I think at first they thought that because we had gone there that it wouldn't be super COOL... They were so pleasantly surprised and loved it!  They loved the dorms, the food, the activities...
And now we wait!:)

They both have to finish this year and I think Caleb another year at home as well! I am so proud of them... not that all kids don't all have their own issues and situations to deal with, and mine are no different... But all in all through the tough and beautiful times, I am really proud of them... 

Emma and her mom came to visit CUW and Moody Bible Institute with us.  She was sold on Moody, Which is super exciting, but we will see what God has planned for her and the boys.  It was really fun to get to have them look at schools together.  My nieces from Wisconsin even joined us at Concordia:)  

Louis said he really liked both schools, but I think Concordia has an edge for him, from what he said:)  We had such a nice time with Emma and her mom... I miss them already... 

Full heart... full schedule...

I honestly feel like I haven't had a moment to breathe...

I don't even think I have had a chance to mention here that I took job teaching part time preschool at our church school...

So yes... now my mornings are filled with 28 preschoolers!  Goodnight, I NEVER knew that 3 and 4 year olds could wear you out like they do me... For those that know me, the last 2 nights I have been in bed early for me, but I literally couldn't keep my eyes open another minute.

I have kids that have no idea how to line up in a line, or follow a simple direction... Then I have kids that read fluently... It is kind of a challenge to plan fun activities for all of them.  But we get through each day with a lot of laughs, hugs, way less tears than 2 weeks ago (PRAISE GOD!!!!) and loads of fun! And I have 2 of the most amazing aides that help me during the week.  I could not do it with out them for sure.

Levi and Isaiah are able to come with me... I am so thankful for that and really couldn't have done it if I could not have them in there. Levi is doing great... Isaiah... is having a ball but it is gonna take take some training for sure:)

Anna and Jojo are doing so well with getting work done while I am gone... They get up early and I get them going with English and Math, they do all their individual things while I am gone and we finish up with History and Science when I return.  I am really proud of them.

And the big boys are starting some college prep things next week.  They have put in a lot of extra hours at work, have company coming this week, and then it will be off to the races with getting down to the real work for them this semester.

Some of the biggest things I have learned so far this year...

Live for an audience of One... The only one we really have to please is our Savior Jesus!  I can't wait to share more and more with these precious kiddos about the God who created them and loves them so very much!

My personal family is trying our best to make family devotions a priority... It seems like as the kids get older, are more involved in different things that we are even more desperately needing that grounding in the only firm foundation we have... Our faith in our risen Savior Jesus!

There is so much more to share about things happening with our crew... Hope to find some time real soon to share:)

The love for him just grows bigger...

I don't think I could be any more thankful for this sweet lady below... Levi's biological mom.  Not a day goes by that I am not overwhelmed with thankfulness for this precious little miracle God gave us and the sacrifice that was made on her part for us to have Levi in our lives! 

 A couple of weeks ago we met her family and Levi's biological grandma and cousin in the city to spend the day at the zoo... It was also the same day as the air show... Wow... what a show we got to see!  It was an absolutely beautiful day!

I think this is one of my favorite pictures... a little blurry... But two moms who love this boy so deeply!

Levi with his biological brother and sister.  Anna is actually a pen pal with Levi's bio sister.  They all have such a sweet time together... So much love for this little guy... Can you ever have too much love for your child?

Levi and Jojo at Lincoln Park Zoo in front of part of the city skyline!

Crack me up!  Levi with Hopie and his biological cousin!  She is a hoot!~

All of the girls!

The whole crew!  It was such a special day for us!

We even got to see the Blue Angels!  That was seriously like nothing I have ever seen... It was crazy amazing, so loud and so thrilling!

We are in awe of the handiwork of God to work a miracle in our lives through embryo adoption... but also when we see the beautiful creations he works everyday!

Going... Going... GONE!

Just like that summer is gone...

It has been a SUPER busy week adjusting to a new schedule for all of us... 

Hopie is doing great adjusting to 1st grade...

Levi loves preschool (he loves most everything) 

Isaiah is a wild man in class and is totally worn out by noon :)

Anna and Jojo are knocking it out of the park with getting some of their school work done while I am gone... they are both actually working ahead, just because they want to:) 

And the bigger boys are doing bits and pieces and getting ready to start their college prep work soon... 

A few last pictures of summer... 

What a view right out of door:)  We are so blessed!

Isaiah having a ball at the pool:) 

The kids sharing slushies at the pool:)  What would we do with out our family pool pass?:)

Sharing Sugies with my littlest love!

The boys helping to reroof the barn on campus...

It is outdoor movie time... We had so much fun having friends over and hanging out outside...

Jojo wanted to camp outside... The whole crew stayed out there a couple of nights... Anna and I even got up one night to watch the meteor shower.  Unfortunately, there are just too many lights where we live so seeing a meteor shower just didn't happen:)  

But we sure had fun sleeping in the tent:)  Easiest camping trip ever:):) 

My frog boy Jojo:)

Treasured friend

God has brought me some pretty amazing relationships out of losing my sweet baby Samuel.

My sweet friend Katie lost her baby girl Emily about 2 1/2 years after Samuel died and my very first conversation with her was the night before Emily's funeral.  And the very first time I met her was the day she buried her baby girl.  One of the things I admire most about Katie is that she see what you get. She is transparent, kind, generous, and sincere.  She is funny and oh so honest!

Never could I have imagined all that we have experienced together since meeting 4 years ago.  We have stayed close even thought now we are 12 hours apart from one another... She used to live literally 5 minutes away when we lived in Oklahoma and I can't tell you how many times she helped me fold laundry while Caleb made her bacon.  :)  Katie was went on my first trip to Uganda with me!  What an amazing thing to experience together!

I am old enough to be her mom:) Truly! She loves my kids and we all love her!

Lucky for us she has a special friend about 2 hours away from us so we have been blessed to be able to spend some time with her lately!

Here we are at Feed My Starving Children making meals in memory of Samuel and Emily!  We packed enough for  56 kids to eat for a year... LOVE IT!!!

We even got to go check out my old stomping grounds where Greg and I met at Concordia on the lakefront in Wisconsin.  The campus is even prettier than I remember it:)  You can't tell by his expression in this picture, but Isaiah loves her so much:)

 

My heart is amazed and thankful that God ALWAYS proves himself faithful!

He is fully capable of bring beauty from the ashes and does it a million times over!  

He is able to weave these amazing friends, relationships, right directly out of our hurt!

Why Heaven will be my eternal bora bora...

I've had a lot of time to think this summer...

In MANY ways my life (as well as some of yours) may  not be what you would have anticipated it being... and then again there are many ways it is more than I dreamed it could possibly be...

I never would have dreamed my life would include...

Losing a child...
Moving so many times...
Moving my children so many times...
Being married to a pastor...
Spending so much time away from my husband or my husband away from me...
Running an infant loss support group...

It can be easy to become discontent... or disappointed at times...

In our crazy social media driven society today, especially with facebook, instagram, and twitter blasting every one's "perfect and happy life" right in your face, it is easy to compare your life to others and become disappointed... discontent... and even disconnected...

Did you know that there have actually been studies that have confirmed that there is an association between Facebook use and depressive symptoms. (Not depression in the debilitating clinical sense, but a milder manifestation)  An article reported in TIME magazine showed the results of a scientific study where scientists studied 600 people who logged time on the social network and discovered that one felt worse after visiting the site- especially if they viewed vacation photos.   

On those days where you are still in your Jammie's at noon, when the kids are arguing,  where there have been tubs of juice spilled, multiple pairs of underwear to clean up (yay for potty training), you feel like you haven't had a shower or adult conversation in days... it can be easy to feel that maybe the grass could possibly be greener...

Or maybe it is one of those days where you missed a deadline at work, you had to waste hours of time in city traffic, you possibly lost a job, or you realized that friend you thought was a true friend, really maybe isn't... 

It is easy to long for something more... something better... maybe what some one else has or has done... dreaming for that to become your reality too...

(In all honesty,What they portray probably isn't completely their reality anyways... )

Whenever I feel that bitter little bugger of discontentment, rearing it's ugly head...
I think of Heaven...

(That is one thing that Samuel's life has given me... an eternal perspective... I am so so very grateful for that beautiful blessing amidst the pain of losing him... He has me longing for Heaven in a way that I had never experienced before)

Truly, I do... I think of Heaven... and  no matter what it is that maybe I feel I am missing out on... I focus on Heaven...

This world is like the tiniest of beginnings... while it feels like life might move slowly some days... This life is just the tiniest of dots, the start of the entire line of eternity... going on and on... FOREVER...

ALL THE THINGS WE LONG FOR OR WISH WERE DIFFERENT IN OUR LIVES... THEY PALE SO GROSSLY IN LIGHT OF ETERNITY...

That  beautiful trip to Tahiti...
Really I will have eternity in somewhere FAR MORE beautiful than Tahiti... Forever there...  It will be like waking up every single day in a place that is so much more beautiful and perfect than the best tropical paradise vacation  I can even imagine:)

That perfect body... Thank you Jesus, that we will be given new bodies in Heaven... perfect bodies... FOREVER... (on a personal note...for me, there will be...  no more kidney stones, pink eye, etc....:)  Yay!!!

That perfect marriage... (Who really has that anyways... two sinners married to one another... Ha!)
We will have that perfect Heavenly marriage... Christ married to the church... His followers... FOREVER... for all eternity...

The perfect chore helpers...(While I am sooooooo very thankful for all 7 of my kids, and so thankful for all of our possessions... With 9 of us... no matter what... we create a decent sized mess.) And sometimes the exhaustion sets in... But in Heaven, I hardly think the tedious job of  changing out seasonal clothing for the kids will be happening... nor the loads and loads of laundry... It will be a permanent vacation from the jobs that sadly take me away from my kids at times.  Can you imagine just worshipping Jesus and sitting at His feet... that being your only real job:):)

That perfect family relationship... Heaven... worshiping our Savior for all eternity... I have a feeling relationships in the sense that we have them now, will be a thing of the past...

That perfect HOME and manicured yard... I can not wait to see the mansion the Lord is preparing for me... Maybe Samuel will be the first one to show me around... CAN NOT WAIT!  That mansion is going to blow doors on any wonderful home or kitchen I could ever dream up here on earth!

That heart that is no longer hurting... He says in His word that He will wipe every tear from our eyes... Tears... no longer a thing to even worry about in Heaven... Can you imagine all the physical, emotional pain, and turmoil we feel in this life... NEVER AGAIN... Wow... just WOW!

Please hear me loud and clear... If your life contains great trips to Bora Bora every year... a beautiful 10,000 sq. ft. home... A near perfect marriage... I am not saying that is a bad thing... I am not saying anyone should not experience such wonderful things here on earth...    Truly I am happy for you...

What a special gift and blessing God has blessed with you with in this life.


 I am only saying for me... in this life...

There are many days that focusing on Heaven gives me just the perspective I need to put my heart back where it NEEDS to be...

I am only speaking from my heart...

I know that anything my heart may potentially be longing for here on earth... That Heaven is going to just blow it all out of the water...  times 100!  Have a blessed day friends!